Labels

Pic from Facebook

Saw this on FB some time ago and I saved it because I wanted to write about it.

Some People are quick to give out Labels to others... 

They may try to label others as the quiet one, the loud obnoxious one, the sick one, the fat one, the thin one, the well-off one or the 'down and out' one... etc

But before you sew those Labels into the fabric of your thoughts and beliefs about yourself, make sure they are going to Serve you. 

Don't become a servant to Labels that don't lift you up or help you in some way! 

It can be hard to do, but you know yourself better than anyone else on this Planet. Know yourself, believe in yourself, and stay true to yourself! 

Everyone has value and something to give our wonderful world. And we dont need to take on board other peoples 'crap' opinions - sometimes I wonder if they are just projecting their own self beliefs out there to make themselves feel better... ♥ Jen

I suppose it is normal to have these labels in our heads.  I don't suppose we can control how we feel.  

Yet, doesn't it surprise you when you hear of a label that someone has put on you?  Doesn't it just make you go wide-eyed and wonder where that came from?

I've been labelled short, fat and black.  Not recently but recent enough for me to still remember it!

I don't know where that came from.  Did it bother me?  No, not at all. It made me smile.  There's nothing wrong with being short, fat or black!  I've family and friends covering the whole gamut of these three words.

The truth is that by Asian standards I am not considered short.  At 165 cm I believe that I am slightly above average.  Fat?  Well, maybe pleasantly plump might be a better adjective.  But when this was said, I believe that I wasn't fat, yet!  Hahahahaha.  Don't we all think we aren't until we see a reflection in the mirror?

Now the last label appears to be about my complexion but I don't know for certain.  Usually the word is dark when talking about skin colour. 

This choice of word is interesting.  Black!  Nobody, in their right mind, who has seen me in real life or in a picture would describe me as black.  Some malice was intended there, for sure!  

The truth is that the labels don't hurt because they are just opinions and nothing else.  

If you have to label people, use the good ones.  The unfair ones are like the cheap stickers and they don't stick well.  

Brand new!

Many times, as a teenager, I wished that I could have a brand new start when hormones were raging and everything seemed dark and dreary.  Nobody understood me and neither did I understand anyone.  

There were even times when I wished I was in another country. I remember feeling so depressed after watching S.W.A.L.K.  I used to lay awake at nights just hoping that I could meet Mark Lester and wanting so desperately to live in the U.K.  Too much TV/movies made me believe that life elsewhere would be better. When I was more matured, I realised that life is good wherever you make it to be.  

At the end of my teen life, I saw this particular quote and it had a profound effect on me.   This gave me a fresh look about my life and that I could make a brand new ending.  As it turned out, circumstances threw me chances to shape and re-shape my life along the way.  

Many things were life-changing but the ones that stand out would be my parents getting a divorce, moving out from home, getting married, having children, being widowed, re-marrying, retiring and finally relocating.  Each time it propelled me to something better and each beginning is an ending to something and each ending is also a beginning.

I think that we would do well to remind teenagers and also adults that there is always the possibility to stop at anytime and start again.  This only needs to happen in our heads.  It's what makes life interesting and ever-changing.

Pillow talk

There are nights when I sleep alone: the nights when Stephen is doing the night shift and I have the whole bed to myself!!!!  While it is a luxury to stretch out, it is also a moment to be thankful for the husband that works hard for the family.

The blessing of having the night shift is that when it's over, there are three whole days free for him to do as he wishes.  So it's a win-win situation for him and for me.

With his new bicycle, he has been going out to shoot the breeze after midnight!  When I get my own bicycle, I think I'm going to join him!  Still undecided about this but maybe I really will do it. We are still scouting for a perfect bicycle built for me!  

Usually on his free days, we go out until we are so tired that we come back and get into bed by 9 pm.  But at other times, we stay up till 2 or 3 am watching TV and walloping ice-cream and cake!  Who cares about calories at that hour??

When we go to bed, we talk about stuff: something that we saw or an event that happened.  Often it is about family and how happy we are to be surrounded by those who mean so much to us.  

The pillow talk can last anything between 5 minutes to an hour!  

Just as quickly as the topics come rushing to us, it also trickles off until one of us falls asleep.  When the other doesn't answer, the talk has ended!  Hahahahahahaha

The reality is that you don't need a pillow to talk.  If you really want to talk, you just do.  You throw caution to the wind and open up the floodgates of your mind.  It is as simple as that.

An unexpected delight!!!

So they spelt my name wrongly!  Instead of Soliano, it became Solidano.  It annoyed the teacher in me but the niece in me got over it quickly.

In any case, it is not about me but about Rufino Soliano.  What an extraordinary life he has led throughout his musical career.  The music he has shared touched every level of society here in Singapore.

Maybe the young may have forgotten him and maybe only the people of the older generation remember his name when he was at the helm of the Singapore Broadcasting Corporation.  It really doesn't matter because his music will live on forever.

There is a saying that (Every man should) plant a tree, have a child, and write a book. These all live on after us, insuring a measure of immortality. – attributed to the Talmud and Jose Martí, Cuban revolutionary and poet.

I think Rufino Soliano accomplished all these in his own way.  

~~~

While I have had letters to Editors of Newspapers published in Malaysia, this is my first print in Singapore.  I am certainly proud of myself.

Likewise, I am so pleased that the National Library Board saw fit to share this poem I wrote.  Thank you NLB for this kindness.  The gesture is very much appreciated.