Of two old souls

Image from Pinterest

Approximately 21,919 days ago, Stephen Felix Grosse was born on 20 November 1959.  

It would have been a miracle for us to have met earlier because we grew up in different countries.  Moreover, our paths never crossed, when we were children, even though our families were seemingly linked via the wife of my uncle.

That's real life, I guess.  Perhaps an earlier connection wouldn't have made a difference or impact.  We only met at a time when we were ready to fit in each other's lives.

We are so different yet the same.  Often I think unlike poles attract and yet we are also alike.  

We had a quiet celebration for his birthday.  I did ask if he would have liked a big bash since it was his 60th but he wasn't interested. In this, we are alike.  There was no fanfare or party!!!  Looks like we don't need a specific day to be happy.  On the days that he doesn't work is when we have a date or eat at home and really it is celebration enough.  Not just one day here and there but every time that we spend together is special.  Yeah, it sounds clichéd but isn't this how it should be!

I had always thought that we would celebrate our 60th year because it is a milestone but somehow it has paled in comparison to becoming grandparents.  Having a grand-daughter changed our focus completely!  Our conversations are always about Cayla Gail and how important she is to this new chapter of our 60th year!  

In fact, she is quite like a 60th year birthday present that keeps growing and growing.  We feel so awesomely blessed.

So 2019, thank you for a superb 60th year from two old souls. 

Seriously, not serious!

Image from WWW

And there it is, I missed a whole month of blogging.  This is what happens when you have Netflix and you start following TV shows which have so many seasons.  

But life is always fun even with all the ups and downs because of Stephen.  He can make me laugh and we can be completely stupid with each other and it's so invigorating.  Having an unusual sense of humour is how we survived before we met each other and now it's how we survive anything and everything that comes our way.  

They say that we shouldn't laugh at people and that the right thing to do is to laugh with them.  With us, it's not possible.  He laughs at me and I laugh at him.  Maybe we are at that comfort level where we can do so without judgement.

Seriously, it's fun and makes me look at life less seriously.  

Blissful living

From Pinterest

Stephen is a joker.  He can make me laugh at almost anything.  Sometimes he will just pluck something out of thin air and make a joke out of it and we will both laugh like idiots.

There are so many things that make me love him.  Like how he makes my coffee in the mornings, no matter what he has to do.  Or how he switches off my alarm so I will sleep on.  Just simple things that all add up to what makes for a happy marriage.

For a lot of my life, I've always felt that I was always giving more than I take but for the first time in my life, I actually believe that I am taking more than I give.  It's taken a lot of adapting to reverse this and learning how to receive and not to worry about any hidden agenda.

And it's not just about relationship between husbands and wives, it's also about what goes on between friends.  

We're always concerned about paying back and keeping the record clean but every once in a while, we cross paths with someone who is happy to just give and be counted as a blessing.  We must remember to appreciate the kindness and be grateful when people are kind.  It is their intangible gift to us.

Some would call it karma but the bible says this

From Pinterest

Albus Dumbledore

Image from FB

I don't know when or even why it started but somewhere along the journey I took with EP, he began to call me Hermione and I used to call him Dumbledore.  I guess it might have been at the height of the Harry Potter series.

Our lives are marked by some events and no matter what happens, our memories are etched there forever.

I wasn't a true blue fan of Harry Potter but I got caught up in it because of the children.  I have to say that I did watch some of the movies.  I can't remember if I read the books.  Probably not.  Spare time was a luxury then.

Anyway, when EP went back to his home country, we wrote to each other with the occasional wishes or greetings.  

Some time ago, EP wrote to me saying that it's time I called him Albus.  He said we should be on a first name basis. That made me chuckle and I didn't forget.

EP's birthday is just before mine so I sent a wish to Albus from Hermione and this was his reply.  

It was the best and most interesting wish of 2014.

Dear Hermione:

Thanks for your kind message. My birthday was a normal day joined with my family.

Now is my turn to tell you...on 21 march

HAPPY BIRTHDAY.........

All my wishes as a wizard go to you, my friend

I hope to see you soon in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry or when you buy your list of supplies (spell books, uniform, etc) in Diagon Alley. Remember that you are allowed to bring a cat, rat, toad or owl..... 

Don´t forget your wand, its important for the Defense Againts the Dark Arts classes.

Don´t worry about your pewter cauldron, I got it...

With all my best 

I miss youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu, Lita, he he 

Albus

I absobloominglutely loved it.

Bicycles again...

So yesterday, we went and bought a new bicycle for me.  I'm taking it as my Chinese New Year present.

But before we did that, we had gone for a second round just to see if I really wanted to take this form of exercise further. For this, we took a longer ride than the first and I felt much better this time.  I wasn't as wobbly and I was steadier. 

~~~~~~~~~~

Sharing my three routes for my own easy reference.  I want to come back later in the future to see how much I've improved since these dates!

 Round 1 (23 January 2013 ~ night) approx 6 km

Round 2 (28 January 2014 ~ night) approx 8 km

Round 3 (30 January 2014) approx 5 km

This morning, we cycled to Lorong 8 to have breakfast and then went to the Hub.  We also stopped at the Stadium for a bit before splitting up.  Stephen went to get groceries while I decided to get home on my own.

The fact that Stephen said it was okay for me to ride back on my own gave me the slight boost of confidence that I needed.

I'll share a picture of my new bicycle soon.  Stay tuned ...

Labels

Pic from Facebook

Saw this on FB some time ago and I saved it because I wanted to write about it.

Some People are quick to give out Labels to others... 

They may try to label others as the quiet one, the loud obnoxious one, the sick one, the fat one, the thin one, the well-off one or the 'down and out' one... etc

But before you sew those Labels into the fabric of your thoughts and beliefs about yourself, make sure they are going to Serve you. 

Don't become a servant to Labels that don't lift you up or help you in some way! 

It can be hard to do, but you know yourself better than anyone else on this Planet. Know yourself, believe in yourself, and stay true to yourself! 

Everyone has value and something to give our wonderful world. And we dont need to take on board other peoples 'crap' opinions - sometimes I wonder if they are just projecting their own self beliefs out there to make themselves feel better... ♥ Jen

I suppose it is normal to have these labels in our heads.  I don't suppose we can control how we feel.  

Yet, doesn't it surprise you when you hear of a label that someone has put on you?  Doesn't it just make you go wide-eyed and wonder where that came from?

I've been labelled short, fat and black.  Not recently but recent enough for me to still remember it!

I don't know where that came from.  Did it bother me?  No, not at all. It made me smile.  There's nothing wrong with being short, fat or black!  I've family and friends covering the whole gamut of these three words.

The truth is that by Asian standards I am not considered short.  At 165 cm I believe that I am slightly above average.  Fat?  Well, maybe pleasantly plump might be a better adjective.  But when this was said, I believe that I wasn't fat, yet!  Hahahahaha.  Don't we all think we aren't until we see a reflection in the mirror?

Now the last label appears to be about my complexion but I don't know for certain.  Usually the word is dark when talking about skin colour. 

This choice of word is interesting.  Black!  Nobody, in their right mind, who has seen me in real life or in a picture would describe me as black.  Some malice was intended there, for sure!  

The truth is that the labels don't hurt because they are just opinions and nothing else.  

If you have to label people, use the good ones.  The unfair ones are like the cheap stickers and they don't stick well.  

Pillow talk

There are nights when I sleep alone: the nights when Stephen is doing the night shift and I have the whole bed to myself!!!!  While it is a luxury to stretch out, it is also a moment to be thankful for the husband that works hard for the family.

The blessing of having the night shift is that when it's over, there are three whole days free for him to do as he wishes.  So it's a win-win situation for him and for me.

With his new bicycle, he has been going out to shoot the breeze after midnight!  When I get my own bicycle, I think I'm going to join him!  Still undecided about this but maybe I really will do it. We are still scouting for a perfect bicycle built for me!  

Usually on his free days, we go out until we are so tired that we come back and get into bed by 9 pm.  But at other times, we stay up till 2 or 3 am watching TV and walloping ice-cream and cake!  Who cares about calories at that hour??

When we go to bed, we talk about stuff: something that we saw or an event that happened.  Often it is about family and how happy we are to be surrounded by those who mean so much to us.  

The pillow talk can last anything between 5 minutes to an hour!  

Just as quickly as the topics come rushing to us, it also trickles off until one of us falls asleep.  When the other doesn't answer, the talk has ended!  Hahahahahahaha

The reality is that you don't need a pillow to talk.  If you really want to talk, you just do.  You throw caution to the wind and open up the floodgates of your mind.  It is as simple as that.

Zoned out on...

Pic from FB

Yesterday, while Stephen was resting after his night shift, I took a bus ride to Geylang, by myself. It's not an altogether long ride but being on my own with nobody to distract me, I actually found myself zoned out from all that was around me.  No thoughts were in my head.  No words were shared with anybody.  I felt so contented and at peace with everything. My guardian angel must have nudged me back to earth because I suddenly realised that I had to get down from the bus.

Stephen gave me perfect instructions and I found myself in an area that I recognised.  I headed for the Geylang Serai New market where we had a sumptuous dinner just two days ago.  Both of us enjoyed the meal and when we tasted the serunding (meat floss), it didn't disappoint.

So your Mission, Lita, if you choose to accept it, is to get more serunding and the blackout curtains which you saw.

I don't know if the mission was a success or a failure.  Success because I found so many lovely things to buy or failure because I ended up with more than I set out to get.

My backpack was filled to the brim and weighed a ton. Never shop on an empty stomach they say and it's true.  I bought so much to eat not realising there are only two of us.  Nothing was wasted though as Stephen took the remaining kueh-mueh to work.

What did I get?  

First, the non-perishable goods!

1 set of two pieces full-length blackout curtains at S$20 (usual price S$39)

1 batik dress for my MIL for Raya (why not?)

3 blouses for me (couldn't resist)

1 hand-held sewing device (so cute)

Now, the consumables!

2 packs of beef serunding (delicious!)

1 packet of prawn serunding (something new)

1 packet of putu piring, consisting of 5 pieces! (the best I've had)

1 packet of seri muka

1 packet of kuih bingka

1 packet of kuih dadar

1 packet of roti jala and chicken curry

1 packet of nasi beriyani

All pictures from the WWW.

HOMAIGAWD, we had a feast!!!

Revenge is sweet...

Pic from FB

I love the beginnings of each month.  It means that we get new US TV series which we can watch at anytime that we like.  

Before, I used to be so happy when I could be the first to watch a show or movie.  Now I've changed my mind.  When Revenge 2 began showing in the US, I was wondering if I should subscribe to it and watch it.  Somehow I didn't get around to doing it and and I forgot about it for a bit.

When March arrived, there were 3 episodes of Revenge 2.  In April, they added another 5 episodes.  The good thing is that it's available to us, since we subscribe to the US TV Series.

Recently, the children came to visit.  How did we start the holiday?   GG and I watched all eight episodes (back to back), stopping only for dinner.  I was glad that I hadn't paid earlier to watch one episode at a time.  It was more fun to watch the episodes one after the other.  In May, we'll get the remaining episodes!  GG, will you be coming back??

Most of the other TV series have complete seasons available.  People usually ask me what I do with my time.  Well, this is one of the things that I do.  

It's such a simple thing but gives me much pleasure.  The only snag is that once I start watching a TV series, I almost always find myself stuck in front of the TV till I've watched the entire season.  

Once I was up until 4 am watching Criminal Minds.  That's my record so far.

If SFG is not working and begins watching a series with me, we usually have a kind of picnic in front of the TV.  I think our record was 3 am watching Person of Interest Season 2.  

Thankfully, I can do all this now without worrying about being tired the next day.  Even if I wake up early, I can snooze anytime I want.  Such is the life of a retiree!

Enjoy a Moment

Pic from FB

It's a beautiful morning.  I woke up early and watched the sky turn from a deep dark hue to a light blue with puffy-looking clouds.  I didn't stand there watching it do that.  I just took a look each time I went to the kitchen to do something.

We have no window grills and each time that I am in the kitchen, I take a peek outside.  At 11.11 am, the sun was shining and it was very windy!  

My favourite ten-storey tall tree is sturdy but the wind shakes the branches and the tree responds by releasing the tiny leaves that almost float in the air.  These are flying all over and often they land in my kitchen.  Like today, there are several leaves which have found their place on my floor. This used to annoy me but nowadays I am glad to see them.  I have convinced myself that nature is paying me a visit and saying 'hello'.  

I've been in the business of rushing around almost all of my life that I often forget how to enjoy a moment.  It's a day like today that I check myself, with a reminder that I should just be grateful for the blessing of being able to pay for the moment by just enjoying it.

A Milestone in my Family

Pic from www.verybestquotes.com

There are four us: three sisters and one brother that make up our family.  I acknowledge that I also have two half brothers, but that's another story. 

For most of my childhood, my father was away working in Singapore, Australia and Vietnam.  Hence, it was my mom who took care of us till we were teens.  By that time, we had all already found our own paths.  For this reason, we were rarely together.  

Our early twenties saw us spread all over.  One in Hong Kong, the other in Penang, leaving the two younger ones in different parts of Kuala Lumpur. All of us were married before the twenties were over.

Our thirties were tumultuous.  All of us went through life-changing moments.  If I remember correctly, two were in Penang and two were in Kuala Lumpur.  Despite not meeting often, we stayed close to each other.  We weren't physically in touch but we remained very much involved in each other's lives.

The forties were the years of settling down.  My sisters were up north in Penang and my brother was mostly down south in Johore.  Yet we still stayed connected, thanks to modern technology.  All of us began finding our niches and digging our feet in for the long haul.  Our children were growing up and we watch them interacting with each other as we had done before.  

The fifties!  My sisters are in Penang, my brother is back in Kuala Lumpur and I am in Singapore. It's a milestone because the baby of our family has finally crossed this line on 10 February (the first day of the Lunar New Year) and he now joins his three sisters in the 50s club.  It had always been his joke to call us the "oldies" and claiming he was still in his forties.  Now he's one of us.  *smug look on my face*.

I wonder what it is like for my mom, who will be seventy-eight this year; to see all her children reach this half a century age.  What does she feel? I must ask her.  

I did a quick calculation to see how old I would be when my son turns fifty.  Heh heh heh! It seems to be in the distant future.  However, time flies and just as these last years have gone by so quickly, I know that soon that day will be here.  I must remember to make each day count. 

It is a nice feeling to know that all four of us have reached the mark of half a centenarian.  It makes me happy but a little sad when I think of all those who have lost a sibling.

I spoke to my brother this morning and I plan to call my sisters later.  I am sure it will be a nice surprise.  I just want to let them know that it is a blessing to be in each other's lives. 

I know this post is a little late but with Chinese New Year and all the other stuff going on, I didn't get to finish it.  

Unknowingly, we ushered in the Lunar New year, with a milestone, for this family who are ALL over 50!  Now that we know, it'll make 2013 special for all of us.

For my sisters (Esmeralda and Lourdez) and my brother (Antonio), I send them loving wishes for a year to be filled to abundance with all that their heart desires.

Logically speaking

Pic from Facebook.

Living in Singapore, I've found that people are generally mindful of the type of property you own. While I find it amusing that it is a much sought-after status quo, I do not think that it is a healthy one.  

The picture above does capture what I feel.  One can own a bungalow or condominium but it's not a guarantee that happiness is in equal proportion to the cost of your home.

We live in a small place.  People have asked Stephen where he is staying.  He always says that we live in Toa Payoh.  Usually, it is disbelief that they show when he says that our apartment consists of one bedroom, one kitchen, one bathroom/toilet, one hall/dining area.  In return, they will proudly inform that they live in apartments that have four or five bedrooms.  

He's been through this conversation before and he usually goes on with something along these lines:

Stephen:  There are only two of us and one bedroom is just nice.

Friend:  But it's so small!

Stephen:  How many bedrooms are there in your place?

Friend:  We have four bedrooms!  

Stephen:  How many people stay there?

Friend:  Oh, there are eight of us.  (Parents and 3 married children)

Stephen:  So two to a room.

Friend:  Yes, four couples so four bedrooms.

Stephen:  How many bathrooms?

Friend:  Two.

Stephen:  For eight people!

By now they are getting it!  The scenario is not as cosy as they thought it was.  They were under the impression that they had a nicer life because they had a bigger home.

Logically speaking, we have a better situation.   

"S" for SMILE

Pic from Pinterest

Last year, my DC (Daily Challenge) Buddy, Darrell challenged me to put this on my FB wall:

I was given the letter "S". Please describe me using one word that starts with "S" and I will give you a letter in return! :) No naughty words please! I am friends with young peeps as well!!!

Being a spoilsport (also starts with 'S'), I didn't want to do it but he called me a coward!  Usually I don't bite that kind of bait but I decided to give in to the temptation.

Imagine my surprise when I saw all these adjectives!  I have removed all the names to maintain the privacy of all those who commented.   If they read this, they will know who they are!

Special

Sincere!

STRONG

Supercalifrailisticexpialidocious ... you all things rolled into one

smart

Superlicious!!!

sweet~

Sexy!

I wanted to say Super Sweet but that's 2 words. So take your pick.

Smile.....

Sensation, Simple, Solemn

Strong! And I don't mean, physically.

Wanted to put SKINNY! HEHEHE!

Stephen ! that's your other half too, right ?

Sympathetic!

'Sunshine' the sunshine of my life...Stevie Wonder.

Seductive and Selfless.

Swee+ness ....

the list of your traits which I collected from the writings of Joseph Conrad...Seductive, Selfless, Self-Aware, Self-Confident, Self-Disciplined, Sensitive, Serene, Sexy, Sharp, Simple, Sincere, Sizzling, Skilled, Smart, Smooth, Soft, Special, Spectacular, Spiritual, Splendid, Spontaneous, Stable, Steadfast, Strategic, Stunning, Strong, Strongwilled, Stylish, Successful, Supportive, Supreme and Sympathetic.

Steadfast

Simply spectacular!

Sedap!

Sassy!

Sensational....serene.

Sweetheart

supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

Supreme

Sensational

Sophisticated... and of course, Sage.
(Couldn't resist, had to provide 2 words )

sweet??? heheh

40 comments and more than 50 descriptive adjectives and all of them have missed this one that is so obvious ... I can't believe it ... "Sensitive" as in empathic. 

What did I learn from this fun exercise?  I learnt that I am surrounded by such good people who take time out to make someone smile.  These are the people who fill my Facebook days with love and laughter.  I feel very blessed and any time that I feel down, I'm going to look at this again.  It's a great pick-me-up. 

Plus, it makes me SMILE!!!!!

End of year thoughts

Pic from FB

I received this in an email earlier and decided to re-read it.  Then I decided to share it since it's that time when people begin to look back and then ahead.  So I hope you will like it as much as I did.  I wish I knew who the author is to give him or her credit!

Hat tip to Pat for this one!

As I've aged, I've become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend... 

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM or sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60's &70's, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love... I will. 

I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set.

They, too, will get old. 

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect. 

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. 

So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.

As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore...I've even earned the right to be wrong.

So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever.

But while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about 

what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day (if I feel like it). 

Keep calm ...

Pic from FB

I need to keep calm because I'm not ready.  I keep telling myself there's time but the invitations are pouring in, some gifts are still unwrapped and I don't know what we are going to do yet.

B R E A T H E!

Okay, feel just a  tad better.  LOL

Baby, it's cold outside....

It's been raining here almost everyday.  When all the windows are shut, with socks on my feet and sitting indoors, I could imagine that it was, indeed, snowing outside.  It's that cold.

There are many who succumb to the advertisements that if there isn't any snow, it isn't Christmas.  Silly of them but what can we do but smile.

Just last week, Stephen told me this story and these are his words in bold print here:

"Some people think or feel that it isn't Christmas without snow. Well, they have got it wrong. Many years ago, when I was working on the oil rigs, I sang Christmas carols while going about my work during the Christmas season. One of co-workers, who was from Australia, said to me, "Heh, what do you know about Christmas. There is no snow in Singapore."

He was from Perth. I said, "Well, it's summer time in Perth, so what do you know about Christmas?".

So let it snow, let it snow, let it snow....."

A day of family, friends, food and fun

Just when you think life doesn't get any better, something like this comes along.  My Uncle Maurice (of the Singapore Robinsons Shopping Centre fame*) invited us to join him for this Carnival.

We didn't know what to expect but it turned out to be a lovely reunion with some family members and especially for Stephen with meeting up with old friends.

The highlight of the whole event was when my cousin, Gerard Keasberry (he's half Soliano), sang on stage.  Here's the video clip,  if you want to see it.  The song is "Every breath you take".

And, of course, a plethora of food, food, food!

Years from now, I will look back on this blog post and remember the happiness I felt.

Here's one with the much beloved Maurice Soliano.

*Mauricio Soliano is one of the oldest and longest serving members of the Robinsons family.  He began work there in 1959 and still carries on with his duties as 'ambassador'.  

Dear November

Dear November,

I got so much done this month and I made great memories. 

What do I want to remember most?

*Prepping home for visits

*Shopping for Christmas stuff

*Esther arriving and spending a night with us.

*My girls coming for a short holiday here.

*Universal Studios for the second time.

*Boat Quay

*Clarke Quay

*China Town

*Orchard Road all decked out for Christmas

*Birthday celebration 

*Cycling along Pasir Ris Beach

*Getting caught in the rain

*Newborns (two grandnephews)

*Mom's last hospital appointment for this year

Yay!  Did I say Yay?

December, I'm so ready for you!

Love from

Lita

Perfectly Imperfect

I will never be accused of having a perfectly kept house.  Am I proud of this?  Of course!

I have always known that the best kept house cannot be a perfect home. Whether or not there are kids or pets, a house cannot be a home if "there is a place for everything and everything is in it's place."

As a mom, I've allowed my child to have his 'mess'.  As a wife, I've allowed my husband to leave things everywhere.  As a person, I've had my moments of cleaning and clearing which may be in equal proportion to many "bless this mess" moments.   

I'm good at camouflaging the clutter if I hear that there's a surprise visit on the horizon.  But when a push becomes a shove, I can be a genius at doing a thorough job.

Often I can surprise even myself, with the outcome of a space, in just a couple of hours.  Once I get in the mood, I can do wonders.  

At the end of the day, it all boils down to finding the balance between being perfect and imperfect.  I've been told that I'm perfectly imperfect.  And I like it!

In honour of my two girls

I live in a Housing Development Board (HDB) apartment here in Singapore.  So I choose to believe that I have a garden in front and out back that is taken care of by invisible people.  The grass is always cut and the place is always looking nice.  Flowers bloom all over and the trees look lush and green.  Walking out and about every time, gives me a sense of satisfaction that there is a place for everything and everything is in its place.

Then last week, my two girls came to visit and when they left, I noticed two new plants.  The earth around it was still fresh.  Who came to put them there?  I wondered about it.  Was I so busy that I hadn't noticed?  Yes, I was out almost every day that the girls were here so I missed this.

Now that the girls have gone back, I have christened these two new plants 'Sha' and 'Vay'.  When I mentioned this to Stephen, he  immediately went to check them out.

Then he did the most unexpected thing!  He made me write their names so he could take these pictures.

Now when we are out, we can see these new plants. I am sure they will grow into beautiful trees.  

This morning when we passed by, he wanted to take a picture so that we could compare the height of the trees and see their progress. 

I'm guessing we'll be taking lots of other pictures as they mature into strong, tall and shady trees.  Already they are taller than he is!!!  

By the way, I just want to mention that these girls already have parks named after them.  :D