Mum Rose and Memories

When Mum Rose Cheow died on 19 December 2023, I was in Singapore.  There was such a sadness that permeated my being when I heard that she was gone! 

I had known her since I was 14 so we had a connection that spanned over 50 years.  It struck me that she was always in my life albeit not always physically.  In the earlier years, it was our love for Doug that naturally drew us together.  In the latter part of my life, she was always hovering in the background and never let me forget that she had my back!

The one thing that I shall remember most about her is that she took chances in life and made the best of everything.  

I had not expected for her to leave anything to me since I am, technically, out of the family picture.  Hence, it was a surprise to see that she had thought of me and left something tangible to keep.  I don't really need anything, but her kindness and thoughtfulness has yet again reminded me that this is the path to follow.

When I saw her little note, it made me tear up.  I have kept a letter that she wrote to me in 1992.  The familiar writing tugged at my heart.  1992 was an especially difficult year but knowing she would be there for me, offering to be there for me, made it bearable.  I shall always be eternally grateful for her love and support throughout the last 50 years.

M is for memories and so much more

It's been a long time since I really needed to be anywhere purposefully.  There were many days when I did have to go out even when I didn't feel like it!  Sitting and waiting for results or news didn't make the hours go by quickly!

One solution for me, at that time, was to read but concentration was difficult.  I did some word games and managed to lose myself in it for a bit.  Stephen also joined me to do some of the challenges.  

Then someone said I should doodle.  It should be easy but that was hard for me.  Doodling is fine when you don't think about it like when you're on the phone.  Otherwise, it can be a daunting task to stare at a white page.  Plus, I'm not exactly the creative kind and art was always a chore for me.  Anyway, I gave it a shot and I am glad I kept these to remember those meaningful times.

This was the first page in my doodle notebook!

Naturally, my thoughts were on one person at that time

and so I went with this.

Looking back, I don't even remember doing these!

I just wanted to fill up the time when mom was asleep.

I tried to steer my thoughts to whatever was playing on my mind.

Creativity doesn't come naturally to me!

 I had to struggle to keep at it.

Somehow these doodles helped me through tough times and I'm saving them here as part of my memories and Mom Myra.  

 

 

This is a favourite picture with mom and her trademark smile when we celebrated her birthday in 2013, at Quentin's, with a nice Eurasian meal.  She was still hale and hearty then and I remember how she asked the waiter if they had tosai!  We all had a good laugh.  We still smile when we think about that day!

M is for MANY MEMORIES OF MOM MYRA

Maid and made Love

Image picked from WWW

It irks me to often see maids carrying the child while the mom enjoys a hands-free outing.  Of course, this is none of my business. People have every right to conduct themselves as they see fit.  I should also add that this isn't a usual scenario but I've seen it too many times to know that this occurs often enough to warrant some thought.

One day I saw a child stumble and instead of reaching out for the mother, the child turned to the maid.  Instinctively, they know who to go to for comfort.  The mother was nonchalant about it.  It's a sad development to see.  

Mothers should be the first person that a child reaches out for, when they fall or falter in life.  

My cup runneth over

Image from Pinterest

Jared tied the knot at the ROM on Monday, 30 November 2015 after five years of courtship.  Their church wedding will be in 2016. Yay!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Young love is so wonderful.  

It's a week since and we're still deliriously happy that everything went so well. The simple ceremony, lovely lunch and dinner/drinks session all made for a totally memorable day. 

While it was quite exciting to finally hear the words, "you are now husband and wife", the defining "moment" for me was during the lunch when I suddenly looked around and felt overwhelmed by all the good people there who love this young couple so unconditionally.  It's a beautiful thing to be surrounded by so much positive energy.

My MIL congratulated me twice.  I can understand her joy. Jared is her first grandson!  I have been immensely blessed to have her as my MIL.  She has been a great role model with her love, encouragement and support for everything I've done.  

Katherine Hepburn nailed it by saying that it's not about what you are expecting to get.  It's always about what you are expecting to give.  May Jared and Gwen hold this message in their hearts and be blessed always by all the love that surrounds them.

My cup runneth over.... 

Image from WWW

Being a Mom

Image from Instagram

It's true!! And I'm sure most moms will agree with me.

While I have had personal satisfaction from all the paying jobs I ever had, the best sense of gratification has been from being a mom.

Maybe I feel this now because my child is all grown up and when he was younger I didn't have the luxury of thinking about this at all. Everyday was a rush and now when I look back, they were fleeting moments.  It didn't seem that way when I was living it but now upon reflection, those days are so distant and seem to be in fast forward mode. 

Today he's 29 years old.  At 1.17 pm that day, a child was born and changed me forever.

What comes to mind always when I think of him is this bible verse ~

Image from Pinterest

7 Moms

On Mother’s Day, most people only talk about their biological mother.  In my case, I’m going all out to boast that I have a mother for each day of the week.  Yup, it’s true. I have SEVEN of them!

Of course, there’s my mom.

Since my parents are divorced,  I have a step mom.

I was a widow and now remarried so I have two mothers-in-law.

Then I found out, I have a step-mother-in-law.

If all that isn’t enough, I also have 2 godmothers.

All of them have completely different personalities. The only similarity is that all of them are great cooks.  I guess in their time, it was a necessity and they honed that skill to perfection.  They look after the home and hearth, without fuss or fanfare.  They love without any expectations.  They are my moms and I am blessed.

Today being Mother’s Day, I want to highlight the best quality in each of them.

Mom Virginia - Her best quality is her quiet, gentle strength.  She takes everything in stride and gives without any reservation.  I have watched her struggle without complaining.  It has been a challenge for me to match her courage in the face of adversity.  She is an amazing woman.

Stepmom Julie - She loves with every fiber of her being.  It took me a bit of time to accept her but once I did, she became “Mama”, in every sense of the word. She has intuition and will pick up the slack if she notices you need something.  She is an amazing woman.

Mom-in-law Rose - I learnt many things from her strong sense of duty towards every member of the family.  She gave me wings to fly when I needed it. She stood by me for so many decisions I made.  She is an amazing woman.

Mom-in-law Myra – Generosity is her middle name. I don’t know of anybody kinder and more giving than her.  She will not take more than she needs.  She will give her last dollar if you ask her for it.  In this, she is selfless.  She is an amazing woman.

Stepmom-in-law Ibu – Stephen and I call her Ibu Darling.  She is soft-spoken and sweetness personified.  From the first moment that I met her, I loved her.  I know she loves us more, and without any reservations.  She is an amazing woman.

Godmother Corazon – I am the daughter she never had.  She’s the one who pampered and spoilt me.  She understood my first heartbreak.  She never asked questions when I didn't have answers.  My teenage years were easier because of her.  She is an amazing woman. She died this year and I miss her very much.

Godmother Cathy – The most elegant woman I know.  She is always prim and proper.  Though we’d not been in touch for years, when she came back to Malaysia, we just picked up where we last left off.  She is an amazing woman.

So there you have it!  7 amazing women in my life.

Amazing women become amazing mothers.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Only when I became a mom, I found out that I could truly and deeply love another human being more than myself. 

Happy Mother’s Day to me and to all of them!!!!!

~~~~~
Originally posted on STEEST but the images got lost so this is a re-post for Mother's Day 2014.