Friday, July 27, 2012

When I am old and frail...

I know that many of my family and friends still consider that a Nursing Home or Old Folks' Home is taboo because we are in Asia.  Likewise there are some who are more open to the concept that the elderly can be happier among their own age group.

I was discussing this with my better half and I told him that if I am unable to care for myself, unable to see to my own medication or look after my own health, I would (if we could afford it) prefer to be in a Nursing Home.

I wouldn't be able to bear the thought that someone has to look after me or attend to my basic needs.  I don't think I will like the idea of having any member of my family putting their life on hold for me.

No matter how people say that it's a duty, it doesn't make it fair.  

Well, this is how I feel now.  I don't know if I will change my thoughts on this when I'm 60, 70  or 80, that is if I live that long.  Maybe I will revisit this post and be reminded of the reasons I feel so strongly about now.

I know there are some parents who expect their children to sacrifice everything for them.  Payback, I'm told.  I don't subscribe to this theory at all.

As a parent, I don't expect my child to do anything for me when I am old.  I only expect love and respect.  Nothing more and nothing less than that will be enough for me.

I wouldn't want to feel that I am a burden or that I am in the way.  I think I could be happy in a Home because I have already decided, in my mind, that it is not a bad place.

Some people think of it as being punished.  I don't.  I think of it as getting the best of both worlds.  The children don't need to worry about taking care of you and you don't have to worry about taking care of yourself.  To me, that is a win-win situation.  

Someone will wash your clothes, change your bedsheets, serve you meals and watch your medication.  What's not to like about that??  After all, I figure that when I'm no longer active, I'll do more of what I already do now like watch TV, read books, write mails and use Facebook.

I think that a Home is what you make it to be.  So when that day comes and I can't look after myself any longer, I'll be glad to go to a Nursing Home.  There is no shame in that.  Not in my books, anyway.

How many of you want to join me????

(pic from photobucket)


  1. You may find this post from "Seniors Aloud" of interest :-)

    1. Thank you, Antares, for the link. I have meant to browse that blog and now I think it is more than just for interest. I am curious and want to know how I can be better than I think I am about older people.

      Hugs for you.

  2. I wrote a reply here, hit 'publish' and realised that I'd lost my connection :(

    But here I go, trying again: I said this same thing to Chuan, and the children. How cool are we?

    I know my children won't like it, should it come to this - but it's only fair, no? We've lived our lives, it's their turn now; without having to worry about us.

    You see that second wheelchair there? Can I 'book' it - so we can havoc in the nursing home together?! ;)

    1. Yes, and wouldn't it be lovely to be able to create havoc when people think we are already over the hill. :)