Just like the song by Middle of the Road!!!
My mom-in-law is in a Nursing Home. She's in a Nursing Home and not an Old Folks Home. It's not a state secret!
(pic from Econ Website)
It was not an easy thing to do. So many people talked and made comments. I suppose it is always easy to do that when they don't have to face the consequences or shoulder any of the responsibilities.
Today, she is doing okay and especially after having undergone a double bypass last July.
Would she have made it this far, if she weren't in a Nursing Home? No one can know the answer. The only evidence we can have is that she is alive today.
The problem with keeping an elderly person at home is never knowing whether the quality of care is sufficient and effective. There are always medical issues that crop up. Without any proper training, it is an irresponsibility to attempt this.
(pic from photobucket)
As long as the elderly person is lucid and there are regular visits, I would advocate that the Nursing Home is a better bet.
The diet is under control. The medication is precise. The care is 24 hours. No matter how much a family member wants to do all this, it is just not humanly possible. Then resentment sets in and everyone starts to compare who is doing more or less.
There are also cases of those who boast about taking their aged parent in and then isolating them later. Realising first-hand that the task is not as easy as it seems. All the earlier lamenting and commenting about putting a family member in a Nursing Home is really nothing more than not using common sense and intelligence.
Yes, there are horrible stories about some homes. And there are also horrible children and horrible parents. Nothing and no one is perfect.
One has to know the limitations and accept that sometimes a neutral and safe environment is better for the elderly.